When I am sat here on one of the stones in Avebury stone circle I always feel a sense of peace and tranquility. That same sense of peace you get when you come home and are able to close the door on the outside world.
In contrast, if I close my eyes and send a beam of light from my heart down through my solar plexus, sacral and base chakras and down into the earth and connect with the energy of Avebury I feel the energy is of a vibrant and buzzing place. A place of feasting and celebration, a place of meeting and ceremony, a place of gathering and spirit.
It is so easy to lose yourself in the energy of the history of Avebury and the veils between the past, present and future start to thin.
Another step, oh my god, I’m petrified. Another step, I’m getting closer. Another step, I’m excited too.
I look down at my feet, my bare feet and feel the cool dewy grass under every step. I feel lots of emotions running through me, fear, excitement, wonder. I’m only 17 and I’m walking towards my own wedding, this morning I woke up a girl, tomorrow I will wake a woman, oh god. No I’m not going to think of the night.
I look down at myself; around each ankle are 3 daisy chains, one from each of the women in my family. My gown is the colour of the palest green, drawing it in at the waist is a beautiful plaited yellow belt. Underneath I am wearing a yellow shift which can be seen at my neck and to my elbows. With the wide low neck of the gown the contrast of green and yellow sets off the gold and malachite necklace the grandmother gave me beautifully. Upon my head I wear a circlet of daisies and dandelions delicately and expertly intertwined with ivy. My long brown hair flowing down to my waist and combed until it shone.
At 17 I suppose I am old to be getting married but I did not start to bleed until a few moons ago so my parents were unable to betroth me, I’m glad as it gave me the chance to meet the man I am walking to marry. He is a good man, he will provide well for me and our family if we are blessed and we are in love. We are so lucky so many marry without love, for status or a good family bond. Yes we are blessed. I left my parents house and soon I will be walking into my own home. The grandmother gave me some words of wisdom before I left. Be strong, love has been kindled but it needs two to nurture a love that will last, be partners in all things, be prepared to compromise and learn to be good, no, excellent lovers. Tonight there will be nerves on both sides but make sure he is kind, considerate, talk to him about how you feel and make sure your mother gives you a glass of wine.
I watch myself walk on, up The Avenue to the great stone circle. I watch the wedding party follow me, all my family and friends, in fact most of the village. I stay behind watching them go, watching her/me go.
The vision fades, I open my eyes, I’m sitting on my stone. I feel quite out of it, let me send down some roots into the earth and ground myself.
Was she me, she seemed so real and I felt everything she felt, was she me? Was that a memory from a past life, or a memory from the land? I’ll never know but it will stay with me.
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