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Who do you become when you are not standing in your truth?

By:Esther Austin
Date: Tue,14 Sep 2010
Submitter:Esther Austin
Views:5485

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A very powerful title, I was told recently at a workshop I ran of the same title. Yes indeed it is. What this subject does is delve deeper into the human psyche to unpeel the layers of who we are. Unpeeling can often be a very painful and challenging process as layer after layer, we realise that there is more to us than we realise or want to face. Exposure is a word that comes strongly to mind and with the word exposure a plethora of other words pour forth such as vulnerability, truth, reality, pain, ego. The ego blinds. It chips away at reality and leaves an external shell with an empty heart. Someone once said – it’s like a cake with icing and a cherry on the top, yet when you bite into it you realise is this what it’s really all about?

In my work I advocate that we have to learn to change language used in terms of how we address ourselves, so that when we are faced with the challenge of looking at our bare faced soul in the mirror and our ‘untruth’ we do so from a place of compassion and love. This way we can look at all the elements of who we are which contribute to us as a whole making it easier for us to face who we are and deal with the pain of our reality or truth.

When we learn to use non judgemental language and be much kinder and more gentle when we speak about ourselves this also empowers us to do the same with others. I will explain further. Rather than use terminology of ‘right, wrong or bad’ about a situation or experience what about saying ‘this is the outcome. Is it how I wanted it to turn out? If the answer is Yes then that is fine. Yet what if the answer is no? Then the outcome is still what is it but now you have the chance to consider doing something about the ‘no.’ Using language like ‘this was a mistake or this was bad ‘ is judgemental. When we use judgemental language we are much more likely to dust the situation under the carpet and not face it.


Therefore, when we do not stand in our truth, in order to help deal with our reality, changing how we address ourselves helps in the process of dealing with and healing. When not in our truth this exposes a myriad of emotions which are often not congruent with who we truly are, because we are not in alignment with our self and our soul’s purpose. In this place we give away a lot of our personal power to others. We allow others, their ideas, beliefs and perceptions of us to become us. We then become resentful, frustrated, angry and bitter allowing ourselves to become confined within the limitations of what we feel someone else has put upon us or even what we put upon ourselves. Yet remember we must take personal responsibility for every action we conduct and how we perceive every experience.

These emotions then eat at the very core of our psyche. So therefore in this process who do we become when we are not standing in our truth? We become a shadow of our former self or do we? For even our shadow is still part of our psyche and make-up, yet when we relinquish who we are to someone else we loose the expression of our Soul. For it is our Soul which identifies and defines who we are, not the external mantle that we wear. It is our Soul which stores our life’s journey and experiences which defines our character and essence. It is our Soul that holds love and compassion within her womb.

Have you ever experienced a soul that weeps? Look at the external, the mantle of the physical that carries our Spirit. Often times this is dull and grey against the sunshine and light of the world. A soul that weeps is one which continuously searches for something outside of itself, and for itself. A soul that weeps is one which no longer laughs from the belly of their solar plexus, but rather from the empty gasket of the heart.

This therefore goes back to ‘Who do you become when you are not standing in your truth?’ How are you feeling about you at this moment in time? Do you even recognise you? How do you experience you? Do you even know who you are, anymore? Are you speaking the thoughts of another? Are you blinded by your own ego which takes only the self into consideration and plays on the emotions of others? Or has fear relinquished your soul of your joy?

The journey to get to know the self again is often a painful one yet with pain growth occurs. Growth of pushing up and through the barriers and places which previously held you in another space. The joy that awaits you at the end of the tunnel is one complete and resplendent with the beauty of just ‘being. ’ Without expectations, without requiring external validation, without requiring another’s approval, without the ego’s heroic pantomime of status. Just ‘being’ in your own space with the delights of your own soul, filled with love, compassion and joy.

So today, I would urge you to think – who are you when you are not standing in your truth?
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Esther said:

Thank you for your comments Patricia. Yes, when we can walk our talk it makes life so much easier. Yet often times we find this hard because we enrol into other people's dramas and sometimes are not even aware of that. Standing in our own personal power is often quite difficult, because we have to really deal with our inner most self and sometimes it is a painful place to be, hence why life is called a journey, because as we move through we who are we move into different dimensions of being. Thank you again
Wed,15 Sep 2010,09:43:27 GMT

patricia said:

This is a very interesting thought which I can take on board.
I am completely happy with my way of doing and thinking, it only gets awkward when I dont comply with the way others are thinking and behaving. Fortunately I am well able to hold my ground and not let myself be drawn into the dramas but how difficult it is when I try to explain why I feel this way and ty to show others to think differently. The thing is to walk the talk then they will see that all is well.
Wed,15 Sep 2010,07:42:38 GMT
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